I run a spunk harvesting business, but mine differs from most of the others in that I harvest only the highest quality semen from top grade homeless men.

The way this is works is: I employ 250 nerds with aspergers to go out into the streets of Oregon and find, catalog, tag, and finally herd the best hobos they can find into our facility. At which point hundreds of old crack whores with gonorrhea expertly squeeze out any jizz they can out of the hobos and put into a jar, which is then kept in purpose built freezers. This keeps the taste and consistency unaltered. High grade hobo cum can fetch a very high price in today's market, we're talking $250 a gallon.

Gallon, you say.

Oregon is not THAT bad!