>>3
I am so honored to be a future part of the 1%, I have been working very hard to achieve this goal and it is now close to paying off.

It wasn't easy, either. I had to spend thousands of dollars on plastic surgery in an attempt to make myself as gruesome as possible; I had to ingest a daily intake of 5000 calories so as to make myself so obese I wouldn't even be able to move out of my bed/desk setup; and I rubbed my skin every morning with a homemade mixture of diarrhea (my own), horse grease, and cum (not my own because I've long since lost sight of my own penis) so as to make my skin smell as rancid as possible.

But now, after all these years, I can finally say I am close to dying a virgin (I'm only 28 but my doctor says I only have two more years to live).